Is it just me? Probably.

More and more as of late, I've become painfully aware that I think very differently than most people. I say most, because there are a few like minded individuals that I've encountered out there, but those people seem to be few and far between. Whether that be because people with my mindset are rare, or due to my limited exposure to the world is certainly up for debate, but really, either answer is of little consequence to my day-to-day experiences.

Please keep in mind, this is by no mean a "poor me" lamenting rant. I like to think that I have always been one to embrace my differences, even when they have been wont to cause me grief. Growing up as a non-religious, left-handed, chubby kid in Utah County, of all places, you really need to learn quickly to roll with the punches.

However, it does present it's own unique set of problems. Twenty-twenty hindsight and all that, but it certainly would explain the vast majority of troubles and issues I encountered in my childhood. Whether this is a cause or a result of my battle with depression is, much like my musings above, mostly inconsequential to my current and future situation.

As a child, adolescent, teenager, one goes through life in a relatively 'stumble and bump' manner. You're either too young to grasp the complexities of social interaction, or you're too much in flux with your awkward stages to know which way is up, let alone the impact of your philosophical dogma.

As an adult though, you start to notice confused, and dare I say distressed looks. You become aware of comments that receive scorn and ridicule. And eventually, if you pay attention long enough, patterns begin to emerge. For a while there, I thought it had a lot to do with where I live. Having secular and left wing view points don't exactly place you in the "in crowd" here in Utah, believe it or not.

But, it seems that over the years, I've encountered an awful lot of people (comparatively speaking) who are originally from other states. And the same patterns seem to emerge. I would even say that the majority of issues arrive during non-political and non-religious conversations. This has led me to believe that it is not a geographical concern.

No, I am not going to give you a list of examples. Mostly because I'm not great at coming up with a case history under pressure. (STOP PRESSURING ME!) However, I'm sure if you glance at the first paragraphs of most of my posts here, both past and future, you'll likely get a feel for things.

Thank God for the internet, huh? Most of the time, I have to temper this stuff. My musings are not for the meek and the timid. Man, if I had a nickel for how many times I've been told I think too much. Of course, to that my retort has always been that most people don't think enough. Oh snap. I bet there aren't a whole lot of people out there who are interested in arguing with that assertion.

But sometimes it's difficult, in everyday life, to go with the flow. I've more or less become resigned to the fact that in order to function in society, there are things you do, and things you don't do. You DO make idle small talk, and go through the paces assuming everything is the way it is for a reason, and keep your questions to yourself. You DO NOT discuss the morality of prostitution, or the dwindling state of fossil fuels, or the concept of light based vision and temporal dilation. You DO NOT point out that obsession with celebrity and Harry Potter might not be as important as being politically aware.

Anyway, this has certainly slipped into a rambling tirade, but honestly, what did you expect from me at 12:30 in the morning on my first post back after a fourteen month hiatus? Temper your expectations people.